If you have a friend or relative that had a baby during the pandemic or is having a baby soon there is a huge chance, they need your love and support more than ever right now. There is also a huge chance that they are not telling you that they do. Most pandemic moms are currently dealing with a level of anxiety or worry they have never felt before and the pandemic is causing them to want to isolate themselves from people to make sure they are keeping themselves and their baby as safe as possible. This may cause your friend or family member to take on a bit more physically and mentally than they should. There are a few things that you can do to help your friend or relative while keeping your distance so that they can have less of a hard time with all of this.

Thankfully, we have so many ways to interact with each other using our phones and social media. You can send them a text message as often as you can to check on them and make sure they are okay and make sure they don’t need to vent about anything. You don’t always have to send long passages you can also send inspirational quotes, mantras, links to meditation videos, funny videos and anything that you think will uplift them or encourage them. Most of our phones also offer voice messages as well so you can send audio of you telling them you care or cheering them on. This way they can listen to it while they are busy with the baby. A lot of the apps we use have a video call feature and you can even schedule group chats with you and some of her favorite people, even if she cannot be on video at the moment, she will be able to see all of you giving her air hugs and showing support. Try not to be offended if she cannot do video because chances are, she is in her mom clothes or nursing very often. Scheduling facetime calls with her and the baby might be easier.

Most pandemic moms are leaving the house as minimal as possible, so to help you could offer to do her groceries for her and run any errands she might need sometimes. She can send you the cash through an app and you can grab stuff for her that way. You could find out what type of wipes and diapers she uses for the baby and when you are out on your own errands you could pick some up and leave them at her door before you head home. If you want to do something more heart warming you could leave her a care package at her door with things like candles, bath essentials, baby stuff, uplifting cards and her favorite snacks. You can also cook a meal for her and her small family that might last 2 days or so, so she has one less thing to worry about. If you are not into cooking, you can offer to deliver something from a food app as well.  

If she is open to visits or meeting up make sure your as open and understanding as you can be when she is expressing her concerns and what would make her feel comfortable. Reassure her that you understand her worries and that you will follow all necessary guidelines to make sure you all will be safe.

It is very important that she knows that she has you for support and that she has people around that understand her. Make sure to let her know any feelings she might be having are valid and that she is not alone. As someone who cares about her make sure you pay attention to her moods and the way that she speaks about things. If she seems like she needs help make sure to encourage her to get help from you, her partner, a therapist, friend or relative depending on what she is dealing with. Encourage her to join support groups on social media and to connect with other moms dealing with the same situation as her. Let her know the importance of selfcare and how she needs to make sure she is making some time for it and making time for sleep.

Celebrate milestones and accomplishments with her like reaching a goal with her breast-feeding journey or her baby learning a new thing. Make sure to tell her she is doing a great job at being a mom and that your proud of her. A little bit of love, encouragement, and support will go a long way and I am sure she will be very thankful for any of these gestures. Remember you do not have to do anything grand to just let someone know that you are thinking of them during these hard times. We never know what someone’s day to day is like or what they may be battling with. This is just a reminder to let any of your family know you care and to especially check in on the new mommies.